A Penny for Your Thoughts
by Ashed15
Summary: A slightly darker take on Penny's origins, profession, and level of intellect. With Penny earning an Associate's degree in English in order to escape from her family's criminality and drama. Beginning with the pilot episode and introductions to the original characters. (Eventual Lenny; Shamy; Howardette)
1. Chapter 1

A Penny for Your Thoughts

The Big Bang Theory

A slightly darker take on Penny's origins, profession, and level of intellect. With Penny earning an Associate's degree in English in order to escape from her family's criminality and drama. Beginning with the pilot episode and introductions to the original characters.

After a complicated past, she leaves her oppressive Nebraskan family to move to the sunny beaches of Pasadena, California.

I do not own the rights to the Big Bang Theory. Written purely for entertainment value.

 _*Note to reader- some content will be directly from the script_

OoOoOoO

TBBT- 1

Packing was easy, Penny thought as she looked at her childhood bedroom that had originally served as a screened porch of her grandfather's farmhouse. Until she came along and dashed her father's hopes of having the eldest born child be a son, her parents had been relatively happy with their mundane lives. Farmer, part-time fisherman, part-time con, Wyatt Brown was surprised to see his little slugger leave the nest to attempt becoming an actress.

Penny had only used that occupation as an excuse to leave. She boxed the child sized trophies and ribbons awarding her with best hair and most charming razzle-dazzle (whatever the hell that was), threw them into a box, and labeled it CRAP. If it hadn't been for her mother's deliberate tears, Penny would have thrown this stuff in the garbage. But, to the forgotten attic it went.

With limited contact or means to travel to California, Penny knew that her family would never learn the truth.

Throughout her youth, she had helped her daddy with fishing tournaments, chores, and the random house-casing con. She was an adorable child interested in Talent Shows, Pageants, Girls Scouts, and making friends. Paired with small hands, sharp eyes, and the ability to fool the smartest security system, her daddy took notice. When she was older, the con jobs passed to her brother and he took them very seriously. Seriously enough to start his own meth lab business.

That was when she knew that her future must be taken into her own hands.

Penny stayed the course through high school, finishing with honors, and keeping her waitress position all while taking online courses for her Associates Degree.

It was a small, satisfying victory when that piece of paper was in her hands.

Her ticket to freedom.

She was smarter than she pretended to be to others, as they had always taken her at face value. She was tired of the act. Pretty eyes, tanned skin, athletic, and popular. Nobody thought of her as deep or intelligent. The cheerleader who snuck into the library. The track runner who was paid to write term papers on the sly for irresponsible classmates. A keen trap shooter with a 32 A.C.T. score.

Penny may not be amongst the Ivy League graduates, but the knowledge she had, was hard earned. Plus, there was something to having book smarts _and_ street smarts.

Her parents were never proud of her intellectual accomplishments, only her pageant ribbons, trophy Bass catches, and popularity amongst the boys. Susan Brown always bragged about being a boy magnet in her youth and seemed eager to pass that trait to her eldest daughter.

Penny Morgan Brown traded her shotgun, poufy parade dresses, softball glove, shimmer lotion, and professional curlers for a new future as Penny Morgan, screen play writer, English tutor, and part-time waitress at The Cheesecake Factory.

She dropped her last name to keep certain family members from tracking her down. The waitressing job was money that she put into a savings account. The screen play writing and tutoring jobs were changing her life for the better. She was happy that she no longer had to hide her books or dumb down conversations with people who may or may not know Wyatt Brown's family.

Penny Morgan was free of oppression.

OoOoOoO

 **4 years after leaving Omaha, Nebraska. Enter Penny Morgan carrying a cardboard box up 3 flights of stairs into her new apartment. A begrudging look stares at the caution tape indicating the elevator is broken. Her brow slick with perspiration and frustration.**

Her boyfriend Kurt's cheating had become too much to bear or ignore. Well, ex-boyfriend. After a heated argument, an open handed slap across her face, and some shameful realization… Penny left. If a relationship became offensive with a man like Kurt, it was time to get out.

She could still feel the shocking sting across her cheek, but was grateful that it hadn't left a mark.

"Whew, the last box." She set down the box and glanced around the apartment. The light blue-gray walls were bare. Open shelves. Large bay windows. This was her new home. "Thanks for bringing up the couch; can't believe that lady sold it to me for $10.00. Pretty neat, huh?" Penny smiled her pageant smile and was ashamed to see how quickly old habits could creep up on a person.

"Just sign here." The mover requested ignoring her comment.

She signed and noticed a couple of men standing out in the connecting hallway staring in her direction. A shorter man with glasses and curly hair. A taller slender man with a bird-like expression.

"Oh! Hi!" She said brightly.

"Hi." The shorter waved awkwardly.

"Hello." The taller nodded.

"Hi!" The shorter said again.

"Hi." She replied a bit clumsily.

"Hi, didn't mean to gawk, but we, uh, live across the hall." The shorter man said with a gesture to the door across the way.

Sudden realization. "Oh! Well, that's nice!"

"Oh no! We're not "together-together". Not as a couple, but together in our own, uh, heterosexual bedrooms."

Penny chuckled again. "Right, I understand. I'm Penny. The new neighbor."

She wondered if they were always this awkward around strangers or if it was just her. Sometimes, people were just too intimidated to carry on conversations with her. So to make them more comfortable, Penny would say something dim-witted or silly to bring out the person or make them feel relaxed.

"Welcome to the building."

"Thanks neighbor, maybe we can do coffee one morning." She suggested.

"Great!" The shorter man said excitedly.

"Great." She said.

"Great?" The taller seemed less eager and stared at his roommate.

Penny stepped back into her apartment and listened to the 2 men bicker like a married couple until the door shut. Staring around for a few moments, she wondered if these boxes had multiplied since arriving here.

A knock sounded.

She opened to see the shorter neighbor before her. "Hi again." He said. His bespectacled eyes nervously watching her and quickly shifting away, as though he would be scolded for staring too long during the conversation. Her brother had a similar expression if he was holding narcotics and an L.E.O. came too close.

"Hi." She smiled.

"Hi." The taller replied in annoyance.

"Hi. We, uh, brought home Indian food. Moving can be stressful, what with the packing, unpacking, sorting, cleaning, and grocery shopping. When I'm stressed, I like to uh, umm, unwind with good food and company. It's comforting. Plus, curry is a natural laxative and a clean colon is just one less thing to worry about." As if on cue, the shorter man bowed his head in embarrassment.

Penny didn't know how to respond to that statement.

The taller scoffed. "I am no expert in the social proprieties of interaction, but I do believe that addressing one's colon should not be in context of a luncheon invitation. Skip any more references of bowel movements."

She had followed the conversation and was thrown by the invitation. "You're inviting me over for lunch?" A default move to defer conversation by stating the obvious. An old habit.

"Oh yes!" The shorter said and the taller nodded silently.

"How nice. I'd love that." Penny agreed, surprising herself at her need for friendly conversation. She followed them over, noting the larger apartment was filled with scientific texts, marker boards covered in equations, and the occasional superhero doll posed as if it were readily used.

"Make yourself at home." She thought his name was Leonard.

"Thanks." She walked to the marker board. "This is really impressive. Is this yours, Leonard?"

He blushed crimson when she spoke his name and as he opened his mouth, his roommate Sheldon, interrupted. "That is actually mine. Quantum mechanics and some String Theory doodles." He snorted a laugh. "Except that part." He erased a bit. "Just a joke of the Bourne-Oppenheimer approximation."

It was difficult to rank her intelligence in the same category as theirs. "Wow, so you're a genius beautiful mind?"

Sheldon's skinny chest inflated a bit. "Yeah."

She smiled at him.

Leonard fluttered. "I have boards. This is mine." He gestured for Penny to inspect his work. She wondered if her need for approval was just as obvious as his.

"Wow. This is a differential equation, right?" She leaned forward a bit.

"Are you a Scientist?" They asked in unison. Their eyes popping wide.

"Oh no," Penny waved her hands, "I've never been very good at math." She said stupidly and tried to backtrack. "But I plan to major in English once I have some money saved."

"How interesting! Pasadena has several good schools. Caltech being one of many, for instance." Leonard suggested.

"Is that where you attend?"

He blushed and Sheldon snorted in annoyance causing Leonard to turn a brighter shade of pink.

"We work there."

She nodded just as her stomach loudly growled.

"You're hungry, go ahead and start." Leonard offered her some plastic ware and a container that smelled spicy. She sat and noticed that Sheldon's nostrils flared.

"That's where I sit." His right eye twitched.

"You can sit next to me." She patted the leather cushion to her right in a silent challenge.

"But I sit there." He pointed again to her position on the couch.

She blinked at his stubbornness. He was infinitely intelligent and yet, childish too. Penny wondered if he didn't get his way, would he throw a tantrum? Challenging him again, she asked "What's the difference?"

Leonard sighed. "Here we go."

Sheldon spouted intelligently reasoned nonsense for a full 2 minutes in a single breath. His face was contorted in willful resistance. Moments ago, he wasn't like any man she'd ever known and yet now, he reminded her of her family. Stubborn just for the sake of being stubborn. Impolite and demanding. She wondered if it ever crossed his mind to ask politely instead of demand and he could get what he wanted. No, probably not. So she decided to be condescending. "Would you like me to move?" She used her sweet pageant voice and fluttered her lashes.

His face was still contorted as he considered her question.

Was it really so difficult, she thought?

"Just sit somewhere else." Leonard growled at the taller man while he smiled at her while. Sheldon turned in confused circles. "Sheldon, sit!" Leonard shouted.

The roommate obeyed with a pained expression as the lunch was divided between their triangle of awkwardness.

"We don't have company very often." Leonard's smile waned as he realized that she must think of him as being lame.

Sheldon countered. "That isn't true Howard and Raj were over here Tuesday until 1 AM playing Klingon boggle. They come over all the time."

Leonard blushed and poked at his lunch. "I remember."

"We're not antisocial and I resent the platitude where you represented me as such."

"I'm sorry."

Penny gathered that this was as uncomfortable for them as it was for her. "Sooo, Klingon boggle?" She asked Leonard to gain some grounds of conversation back from Sheldon.

"Yeah, like regular boggle only in Klingon." His eyes shifted around until they focused on a spot right above her forehead. "Enough about us, tell us about yourself. What do you do for a living?"

"I write screenplays, tutor in English, and waitress part-time at The Cheesecake Factory."

"Wow, quite the resume." Leonard stated. His sincerity was heartening. "Anything that we would have seen?"

She felt her face redden a bit. "Probably not. It's not A-Class movies or plays or anything… mostly just Science Fiction." She mumbled.

Sheldon's eyes perked and Leonard leaned forward in silent fascination. "That is really interesting!"

Sheldon asked, "Do you prefer genre fiction to literary?"

"Well, that isn't easy to answer. A fundamental rule as a writer, is that a set measure can be approached 2 ways. But Literary fiction can also be a genre."

"How is it fundamental rule?" Sheldon asked. His thin brows furrowed.

"Take your boards, for instance." She rose and used the plastic fork to point. "You can use equations to map out a story. That is usually genre fiction. Literary fiction may break the rules of this equation, but usually, genre fiction does not. Especially once you find a popular focus-flow."

"That seems like a stretch." Sheldon countered in condescension.

She smirked. "Look at all of the hero movies…"

"Which ones…" Sheldon went to the shelf. "Marvel, DC, Star Wars."

"I dunno, pick one." She shrugged and watched the tall man struggle until Leonard rolled his eyes with impatience, stood, and chose Batman. "Okay, so you have your hero (H), villain (V), damsel (D), backstory (BS), settings (S), and supporting characters (SC)." She wrote on the white food container.

H + BS + V + D + SC + S = Story

Both men observed her rudimentary equation and conferred with each other. Leonard rose. "What if you did this?!" He erased a section of his board and wrote:

H(BS+S)*(S+D)/V(BS+S)(SC) = Story

For math never making sense to her, Penny followed this equation very well. "Wow, this really is impressive. What exactly do you 2 do for a living again?"

"I'm an Experimental Physicist and Sheldon is a Theoretical Physicist."

Penny blinked several times in wonderment. "Well, that is a hell of a job, I bet. Much better than my story." A touch of sadness entered her voice.

"You have a very creative vocation, right Sheldon?" He elbowed the taller man in the ribs none too gently.

"That depends on if you're the hero or the damsel." Sheldon was still inspecting the equation. "If you take the equation seriously, the damsel is never actually a part of the end of the story. Never the answer." He observed the equation and replied a bit robotically.

Suddenly, all of the air vacuumed out of the apartment. Penny couldn't breathe. Sheldon was right! She couldn't be the damsel in her own life! Kurt was never the hero; he was the villain! She turned to Leonard and said in all seriousness, "I've just wasted 4 years of my life with a villain; that's as long as high school. Heroes don't do that."

"It took you 4 years to get through high school?"

"Sheldon, don't." Leonard sighed. "Heroes can be fooled too. Look at Thor? His brother is constantly tricking him." He nudged his roommate.

"Oh, yeah, he is correct." Sheldon shrugged his shoulders; clearing missing the point.

"I can't believe I have to start all over… again." Penny felt pathetic.

"Don't be discouraged. Starting over is a paradox. If you didn't find out about your ex and his cheating, then you'd still be living in ignorance. Well, er, uh, not that you're ignorant, just that you, uh, didn't know that he was cheating. And now you do. And as a Scientist, it is always better to know than, not to know. I'm not making sense. Sorry."

"No, actually it makes sense to me. Thank you, Leonard." She pasted on a lopsided smile. "You must think I'm a mess. Wait, I am a mess!" She looked at her grimy arms and knew without a doubt that she must look like a hobo. "I'm a both a hygienic mess and an emotional mess. If my shower worked, I could actually wash it all away."

"Our shower works." Leonard blurted.

She stared at him to see if he was being serious. "Would it be weird if I used it?"

"No." He blurted again. Just as his roommate said, "Yes."

"No. No it wouldn't, Sheldon." He gave a significant look.

"Right. No, it wouldn't be weird." Sheldon sounded more automated than a robot.

"It's right down the hall." The shorter man offered.

Relief spilled over Penny as she quickly embraced her new neighbors. "You 2 are the real heroes of this equation." She thumbed to the dry erase board. "Thank you so much." She could have skipped into the shower and would have if it were not for the already unusual situation.

OoOoOoO

Leonard Hofstadter watched the most beautiful woman he had ever met prance merrily into his bathroom. He was certain that there was no other man as fortunate as he was. Until Sheldon Cooper ruined the moment by speaking.

"What an interesting development." Sheldon's voice was an octave above a seagull's screech.

"Why is that?" He kept watching the bathroom door to make sure that Penny didn't need anything else. Like a towel or someone to help scrub those bronzy shoulders.

"A beautiful woman is naked in our apartment. I think that is the embodiment of 'interesting development'. Wouldn't you say?"

Howard Wolowitz and Rajesh Koothrappali had entered their apartment just as Sheldon was explaining himself.

"Naked? Who? Why? When? Here?" Howard's eyes bugged out comically. "Is your grandma back in town Leonard?" He scoffed an annoying laugh.

Leonard realized that he was not in the mood for anymore company. Maybe he could tell the boys to go away. Trick them into leaving the apartment before Penny emerged. "I think its best that you all leave. Sheldon, why don't you all go to the comic book store?" He passed over his wallet. "Buy something, anything! My treat."

Sheldon's lips pursed into a thin line as he shook his head. "What are you trying to accomplish, Leonard? That woman isn't going to have sex with you." Sheldon may not have the ability to detect human emotion, but when it was this obvious, even a cactus could read hormones.

Leonard gasped. "I'm not trying to have sex with her!"

"Oh good, then you won't be disappointed." Sheldon snagged a $5.00 bill. "And I can get a comic book too. Oh goodie!"

"Wait, why wouldn't she have sex with me? I'm male, she's female. We engaged in sociable interlude. There is no reason that a carnal relationship couldn't develop!"

Sheldon scoffed. "Isn't it obvious?! The parameters of gender are not in question. You are not even in the same species. I'll admit, she is smarter than she looks. But if you think that a carnal relation is going to come of this neighborly act, you're wrong."

"What about the bro code?" Howard interjected.

"Bro code?" Sheldon's eyebrow rose.

"You're supposed to be Leonard's wingman. Talk him up. Make him look good."

"I think it's going to be difficult when she discovers the Darth Vader shampoo and Skywalker conditioner." Sheldon replied.

"No tears and tangle free brand?" Raj asked with a mouthful of noodles.

"Yeah." Leonard said lamely. This day was getting worse by the second. He needed to get them out of here before they embarrassed him into hibernation. FOREVER. Howard and Raj gave Sheldon a link to watch Stephen Hawking make a public speech at MIT in 1974.

"Hey Leonard?" Penny asked from the hall. Her surprise at discovering a roomful of men was evident. She pasted on a smile that was brighter than a Pasadena sunrise. Oh! And she was using his towel to cover her golden skin! The euphoria that passed through Leonard was ridiculous. "The shower knob won't budge." The way she nibbled her lip was adorable. "Hi, sorry, didn't mean to interrupt everyone."

Howard popped up off of the couch like the clown in a Jack-in-the-Box. His French greeting was flawless and he knew it. He took her small, delicate hand and gently pecked it. "Howard Wolowitz, Caltech, Applied Physics. You're probably familiar with my work since it's currently orbiting one of the moons of Jupiter."

Sheldon and Leonard shared an eye roll.

"Oh yeah? Which moon? Europa? Io? Callisto?" She paused. "Uh… I can't remember the other one." Penny chuckled nervously.

"Ganymede." The men all simultaneously answered her.

"Gorgeous and intelligent!" Howard still had a hold of her hand.

"It was the planet I chose to write about my freshman year." She glanced warily at Leonard.

Always the hero, he took the silent cue and saved her. "Right, the shower. The knob sometimes sticks. I'll help." He gave Howard a shrewd look when he babbled some more French. Keeping his eyes carefully averted away from those shapely legs, Leonard adjusted the temperature.

"Thank you!" She opened the curtain and hopped in without waiting for him to leave. Her arm stuck out and she dropped the towel. The room and his blood pressure steamed. He tried to hurry out, but she asked, "Leonard?"

"The shampoo is Sheldon's." He said a bit too guiltily.

Her chuckle sounded throaty and inviting in the echoes of the tub. "Thanks for being so kind to me."

"You're very welcome." Leonard took that as his cue to leave. When he emerged from the bathroom, the men were waiting to barrel him with questions.

"She isn't using my toothbrush, is she?" Sheldon asked.

"Don't be absurd."

"When I heard naked woman, I just assumed that your grandma was in town again. I didn't realize that you had an actual goddess washing her silken skin…"

"Howard! Rein it in a bit, will you?" Leonard said grumpily.

"Why, are you anticipating coitus?" He asked.

"Of course not, she is the new neighbor and needed a hero to save the day." He grinned over at the equation.

"So, she's available for pursuit of coitus?" Howard rounded again.

"Please stop saying coitus." Leonard begged.

Sheldon giggled. "Ha, coitus interruptus."

"I could drop some proverbial poetry." He added. "In 6 languages. No other hero can do that."

"Wrong!" Sheldon interrupted. "The Silver Banshee, Deadpool, Professor X, and Gandalf are all heroes that can speak any language known. Including Elvish."

"I thought it was pronounced 'Elven'?" Raj asked.

"No, Elven refers to the elves of Middle Earth who speak Elvish." Sheldon explained.

The quartet exchanged many questions during lunch until Penny emerged. The friends quietly leaned forward when she sat in the overstuffed chair. Her skin smelled sweeter and her body chemistry changed the clean, soapy scent of Darth Vader into something floral. The friends all had dreamy, intoxicated expressions on their faces. Sheldon included.

"So, you guys work with Sheldon and Leonard?" She asked Raj in a perkier tone than before.

Raj turned his head to drink deeply from his water bottle.

"Oh! Do you not speak English?"

"He speaks English, but he can't speak to women." Howard replied for his closest friend.

Penny squinted her eyes to determine whether or not she was being tricked. "Seriously? Why not?"

Howard scoffed. "He's kind of a nerd." He walked over to her chair and leaned over in all seriousness. "Would you like a cherry or grape juice box?"

From the expression on her face, Leonard decided that Howard was out of the competition of courtship for his new neighbor. Then, he chided himself for thinking so little of this intelligent beauty before him. "Would you like some help unpacking?"

"What? Really?" She asked.

"Sure. I was just going to hang out here and watch Battlestar Galactica." He realized too late that he shouldn't've added the last bit. "But mostly for background noise while doing some research." He received several perturbed looks from his friends.

"I mostly just need help organizing. That is the part that overwhelms me the most."

"Organizing? Can I help too? That is the best part. Unwrapping, putting everything in its proper place." Sheldon looked absolutely drunk with eagerness to help.

"We can hook up your TV and DVD player while you paint those shapely toes." Howard stated.

"Oh, thanks. But my TV is kinda old. Kurt kept mine, so I had to buy an old junker second hand." Penny said in embarrassment. "Dinner will be on me!"

Penny, Raj, and Howard strode over to check out the vintage technology. They were both fascinated by outdated gadgets.

"To what end will this be, Leonard?"

He smiled dreamily. "Our babies will be smart and beautiful."

"Not to mention… they'll be imaginary."


	2. Chapter 2

TBBT- 2

A Penny for Your Thoughts

The Big Bang Theory

 _*Note to reader- some content will be directly from the script_

(O)

Sheldon walked up the stairwell, humming the song he created as a child for naming the stars. Every other step would alternate the beat of his tune. On the fifth step of the last stairwell, he retrieved his keys from his jacket pocket. As was his habit.

"Son-of-a-bitch!" A shout sounded from his new neighbor's apartment. "No! No-no-no-no-no!"

Southern codes of propriety dictated that a man should implicate himself to the lesser sex in a time of absolute need. Fortunately, Sheldon did not believe in such a thing as the 'lesser' sex. Gender did not render the intelligence of any being. Look at Madam Currie. His mind shifted to the radioactive findings of… his thoughts were again interrupted.

"No! No! No!" A loud crash. "This can't be happening!"

Sheldon's hand hovered at the lock of his apartment when he decided that southern codes of propriety should be followed. He knocked rhythmically on his neighbor's door. It was badly in need of another coat or 2 of paint. He would give Penny the number to building maintenance, although, she probably had it. Each apartment came with its very own 'welcome' packet. Sheldon himself had been part of the committee to organize those packets delivery. Even if it was only a 1 person committee comprised of himself.

"Yeah, hang on." Penny answered gruffly from the interior. 8 footsteps sounded through the chipped door when it opened. "Oh, hi Sheldon."

"Hello." Sheldon shocked himself when his first thoughts were of her well-figured shape and toned arms. She wore a yellow daisy tank top with ripped jeans and yellow flip flops. He liked that his neighbor had taken the time to coordinate her outfit. "You were shouting."

Her eyes squinted. "Sorry about that; not having the best day."

"Southern custom dictates that I should ask if you're in any danger," he glanced around, "but I think the only thing that you in danger from is stepping over these boxes and jackknifing yourself over the ottoman. Clearly a health hazard." The building's maintenance number was right there on the fire escape map hanging on the refrigerator. Good, he thought.

"I'm still sorting through my belongings." She replied.

"You've been here for 3 days." He reasoned.

"Yeah, but my computer keeps crashing and I've spent all of my spare time rebooting it." Penny frowned at her duct taped computer with the chipped keyboard and worn curser sensor pad.

"Buy another one."

"That takes money."

Maybe Penny believed that Sheldon was unaware of how the economy worked. "Yes, money will purchase you another computer. I can make a few recommendations if you'd like." A list quickly formed in his mind.

She face palmed. A clear indication of… anger? Or no, frustration! Yes, that was it!

"Sheldon, sweetie." She spoke slowly to annunciate her words. "I'm unable to purchase another computer because I do not have enough money. I don't have enough money because the script that was on this computer…" She held up the sad equipment. "This computer has CRASHED. I've tried to recover the hard drive, but the backup failed. Then the screen went black."

"You should have had another backup." He said in an obvious tone.

A chill that was unrelated to the building temperature settled in the room. Gooseflesh rose on his arms. Sheldon knew if looks could kill, that he'd be deader than his childhood dog. A chilled, frostbitten murder if there ever was.

Penny held up a flash drive. "I have another outline on this, but I… I don't…" Her face crumpled. "My script is due in 2 days and I don't want to start all over again!"

"But you're good at it." He observed as she flashed him another lethal glare. "Now hang on, don't yell again. Just look around you; you did all of this yourself. Leonard watched you for hours, carrying heavy boxes, using the stairs." He added as a side note, "obnoxious, really. We were playing teams on Halo."

"What do you mean, he watched me?!" She squealed.

"Well, he was going to offer to help you, but Wolowitz kept making fun of his attempts and Leonard chickened out." He explained finding Leonard's cowardice suddenly distasteful.

Penny pursed her lips. "Oh, what was your point again?"

Sheldon thought it was obvious, but the minds of the common folk were always too slow. "My point is that you do not lack the ability to begin again. Look at the caterpillar." She leveled him another glare and he stopped his longwinded speech midway. "You're more than capable. Maybe not organizationally capable…" He stared at half open boxes and the empty shelves in the kitchen. "Plus… you're looking at a man with an IQ of 189. Your duct taped computer is NOT a challenge." He opened his hands and received the shabby laptop.

"Wow, thanks Sheldon. It means a lot."

"Yes, well, this should take me a couple of hours. In the meantime, you'll be able to tackle this messy hellhole." He waved to the general mess in front of him.

She grinned and in that moment, Sheldon thought he understood his friend's incessant need for female companionship. Luckily, it passed quickly.

"Thanks, Sheldon. I'll make us lunch and get started on this hellhole." Penny giggled.

"It's 4:30, you can hardly make us lunch."

"Dinner then." She replied.

"Too early for dinner, but I understand the convention. Since it is Wednesday, we usually eat early, go to the comic book store, and play Halo at 8 PM. Which gives me until 6:30 PM to fix this monstrosity. So, I suppose an early dinner is in order."

Penny rolled her eyes. "Fine. I can order take out or make sandwiches."

Sheldon took a few moments to run through the list of menus programmed in his memory or the contents of Penny's refrigerator. His tummy rumbled at the thought of food and he decided that sandwiches were the quickest solution. "Sandwiches, wheat, marble, or rye bread, mayo, cheese on the mayo, deli turkey, then lettuce, then cheese, and the other slice of bread."

During his order, Penny had been busy at her counter. Clearly, he hadn't been paying attention to her inattentiveness. "Here, I've got tuna." She had passed him a sandwich wholly unrelated to his order. "Grocery shopping is next on my 'to do' list. Plus, this isn't a restaurant."

"Clearly." He eyed the sandwich and his stomach cramped with hunger. "Alright, thank you. I think. There are veggie chips in our apartment, help yourself while I begin fixing this sorry excuse of a laptop."

"Gee, thanks Sheldon." Penny replied dryly.

"You're welcome, Penny." He replied with a small smile, entirely missing the sarcasm.

Sheldon sat in his favorite place and began working on her laptop. She hopped between eating, cleaning, and pulling him out of his concentration with brief interludes of conversation. Instead of finding it tedious, Sheldon found conversation with his new neighbor enlightening and enjoyable. Well, slightly enjoyable.

OoOoOoO

Leonard and Raj walked up the stairs of his apartment to find a peculiar sight. Both the door of his apartment and Penny's was open. His hope of snagging Penny's attention stirred deep in his abdomen.

Raj asked quietly, "What is going on? Do you think you've been robbed?"

Just then, Penny dashed across the hall, called a short greeting to them, and went into his apartment. Leonard's hope at starting a romance with her rose a great deal.

Raj glanced at Leonard with wide eyes. He would likely remain silent for the foreseeable future or until Penny was out of sight. "Penny, is everything okay?" He set his car keys in the bowl and his messenger bag on the wall rack. "What's going on?"

"Sheldon just fixed my laptop!" Penny cheered. "You're a lifesaver!"

Then, to Leonard's horror, Penny gave Sheldon a tight hug and friendly peck on the cheek. Instead of balking at the unexpected physical contact, Sheldon gave an awkward pat on the back and said, "You're welcome. Where's Howard?"

"He is meeting us at the comic book store." Leonard replied impertinently.

"Are you all ready to go?" Penny shouldered her purse.

"Yes, let me get my jacket." Sheldon said.

"Really? It's not that cold." She responded.

"I suppose you're correct, but if I get a chill, it's on you."

She huffed. "Then, I'll make you tea."

"Oh! I like tea. I have mint and ginseng, though I don't really like it."

"Why do you have it?" She asked.

"Leonard bought it and it seemed rude to point out to him that he was wrong again."

She laughed and fidgeted with her phone in the hall.

Leonard was baffled at their easy flowing candor and said so to his irritating roommate. Sheldon was always difficult when conversation was on the table.

"Penny is going with us." Sheldon replied.

Raj made a noise somewhere in his throat, which Leonard echoed in unison. "Can you explain exactly what transpired in my absence? Because I'm completed baffled!"

Sheldon groaned. "Penny's computer crashed. She made me a sandwich while I fixed her laptop. This allowed her to complete the many tasks she had to do. Thereby, saving her career as a screen play writer. When I mentioned the comic book store, she thought it would be a good idea to tag along."

"Tag along?" Leonard pressed. "Good idea?"

"For inspiration. She is in need of creative inspiration. Jeez, Leonard. It's like talking to a wall. A very uncreative wall." He turned to the golden skinned goddess. "Leonard isn't creative like us; he just doesn't get it. Come on, Penny, Leonard can drive. I'd like to arrive there in one piece."

"Ha, ha." Penny smiled at his tall roommate. "Let's go!"

The 2 of them left after she locked her apartment. They chatted each other up as they trotted down the stairs shoulder to shoulder.

"What just happened?" Raj asked him after Penny was safely out of hearing distance.

"Beats the hell out of me."

OoOoOoO

 **Enter Raj, Leonard, Sheldon, and Penny into** _ **The Comic Center of Pasadena**_ **. Lime green walls were covered with movie posters, caped heroes, and dashing villains. The owner, Stuart Bloom, a pasty faced man with a slight shoulder hunch and kind eyes stood with an overweight patron. In fact, several patrons were present. Skinny, short, chubby, pimply, bespectacled, and each were male and a bit dorky.**

Leonard was still reeling over the situation. It didn't help that Raj did his annoying silent snickering laugh every time Sheldon and Penny spoke. It was almost like they were FLIRTING!

"Wow!" Penny exclaimed. "What a cute little store." A pause. "Leonard, everyone is staring." She froze mid-step.

It was true, the entire store was held in a state of perpetual immobility. Their gaping mouths could literally catch flies. He grinned at her, "No worries, they're more afraid of you than you are of them."

"I kinda doubt it." She replied drily.

"Penny, based on what you told me earlier, you'll find the selection on the back wall to the best use for your script." Sheldon pointed to the far wall.

"Great, thanks!"

He walked her over to the wall, ignored the gawkers, and suggested several comic books. She laughed at whatever he was saying and the entire room was clearly showing their bafflement. How did Sheldon, a compulsive narcissist, become a smooth talking ladies' man?!

Stuart strolled over. "Hey Leonard, can I help you find something?"

"How about the reset button on this day?" Leonard growled as he glared at the back of his roommate.

"Who is Sheldon's girlfriend? She is giving half of the customers an asthma attack." Stuart was correct. Many of the guys were pulling puffers from their jacket pockets. Almost in synchronization, one by one, they pressed down and inhaled.

Leonard rolled his eyes. "They're not dating." He hoped.

Howard joined Leonard and Raj. "That's right. She is with us." Howard gestured to the gawkers.

"Bunch of nerds." Raj thumbed to the group of poor breathers. "So pathetic."

"No kidding!" Howard agreed. "Oh, hey! A batman belt buckle."

Penny brought over a handful of comic books and said, "Sheldon really knows a lot about comics."

"Penny, this is Stuart. He owns the shop." Leonard introduced them.

"Blink twice if you're here against your will." Stuart joked.

To his horror, Penny laughed with Stuart. A deep, stomach holding laugh. Leonard decided that finding a reset button wasn't as important as borrowing Sheldon's childhood design for a sonic death ray.

"Well, let me know if you need any help." Stuart smiled naturally which shocked Leonard. Stuart was usually as nervous around women as Leonard was. Maybe not as bad as Raj, with his selective muteness. And definitely not as aggressive as Howard's bold brazenness. But Stuart didn't stand a chance with a girl like Penny.

"Thanks." Penny replied and turned to face Leonard when Stuart cashed out a customer. "He seems… nice." Her tone suggested that Stuart was a bit lame.

"Well, now, Stuart really is nice." Leonard added, suddenly defensive now that she showed no interest in his friend. "He owns his own business. Comic book stores are making a real come back, you know? Plus, Stuart was an art major. He is a talented artist. You have to see the customers from his perspective…they're not weirdos. Well, except for Captain Sweatpants over there."

"Yeah, he is the one who caused me to retreat." Penny's brow raised. "I'm going to buy these."

As she approached the counter, Stuart began chatting her up. Apparently, he had drawn a likeness of Penny wearing a crown and carrying a bloody battle sword. The depiction was clearly meant to impress, though, Leonard tipped up on his toes and saw that the drawing was a bit cartoonish. Apparently, Penny was determined to be impressed by anyone except himself. What had Leonard done to be so determinedly discounted?

"What's going on over there?" Raj asked him.

"Stuart is putting the moves on Penny." He rolled his eyes.

"I've got to learn how to draw." Howard replied with his usual gusto. "Ladies are _always_ drawn to artists."

Penny's laugh unnerved each of them.

"Jeez, Stuart is really up in Penny's business." Raj said a bit possessively. "Look!"

Penny held Stuart's hand with hers and used a marker to write on his palm. "Okay, you've got my number, now give me the picture."

"You drive a hard bargain." Stuart passed over the drawing. His complexion was brighter and his pallor was no longer pasty white. He looked so… so… normal!

Sheldon approached. "So, how do you like anything can happen Thursdays?" A beat. "Bazinga! It's Wednesday!" The dorky beautiful mind giggled to himself. "I just kill me!"

Leonard scowled at his roommate and determined that he would discover the location of a daily reset button; even if he had to invent it himself.

(O)

Penny retrieved her laptop and set to work straightaway. She had lost nearly 4 days of writing time and had only 48 hours to complete her scripted screenplay. It held potential for a regular position writing for the Syfy Network. She said goodnight to the guys, went to her newly organized apartment, and made a hot pot of coffee. This would be a long 2 days.

She turned on the newly rebooted laptop to a surprising new background of Sheldon's face with a speech bubble saying 'Help! I'm trapped in a computer.' His face had smashed against the screen as if he really was trapped inside.

It made Penny chuckle.

With the handful of comic books laid open for inspiration, post-it-notes, and loud blaring music blasting through the earbuds… Penny's fingers flew across the keys.

OoOoOoO

 **Penny Morgan's coffee pot drained. The sink full of stained cups and milk crusted bowls. Laundry piled high. It was clearly in need of cleaning as the writer typed furiously on the chipped keyboard of the duct taped laptop. The calendar nearby indicated a reset tutoring appointment and a work schedule for The Cheesecake Factory.**

41 hours later, Penny hit save and immediately contacted her registration agent. Given the early hour, she was surprised that they answered. To protect her work, the screenplay should be registered. She had learned that the hard way, when her very first movie screenplay had been stolen for some ridiculous movie called _Serial Ape-ist_. It was the most humiliating moment of Penny's career. A rookie mistake.

The navy night sky was turning brighter by the minute.

She took a moment to appreciate the sunrise before doggedly cleaning her living space. Scrubbing the counters, vacuuming, and putting away clutter. She smiled at the comic books that had served as a unique writing and research tool for this work. With any luck, this screenplay could provide a regular working career for the future.

Tugging the heavy laundry downstairs was tedious and soon the rhythm of the machines caused Penny to drift off to sleep. Just 30 minutes later, a loud ringing sounded from the cellphone.

"Ello?" Penny's voice barely a whisper.

"Hey slugger!"

She straightened after glancing at the phone screen. "Daddy?"

"Good morning, how is the little actress?"

"I'm doing great, still not having much luck with auditions." She chewed her fingernails at the lie. "How are you and mama?"

"Whelp, I'm not gonna beat around the bush. We're not doing so great."

"Why? What happened?" She feared that someone had died. Even with the time zone difference, her father usually left the phone calls up to her mama.

"Your brother was arrested again yesterday. The particulars… well, can't really talk about it over the phone, but we're short on funds and I've got a crop to harvest. I need help, slugger."

She groaned. "How much is the bail?"

"5 smackers." He said. "If we go through a surety bonding agent, it's only 10 percent. It's either that or we put up grandma's house."

Penny winced. "So $500, huh? Let me see if I can pick up an extra shift at the restaurant."

"That's my girl." A pause. "Whelp, gotta start the day. Talk to you later."

"Bye daddy."

The buzzer on the dryer startled her out of a depressive reverie. With a groan, Penny lifted herself off of the floor and folded the laundry on autopilot. Lugging the basket up several flights of stairs, she dropped it on the turquoise sofa and called The Cheesecake Factory. They indicated that the 11 AM to 6 PM shift was open and she grudgingly agreed.

With a glance at the calendar and the notation of an 8:30 AM tutoring appointment, a much needed shower was in order.

OoOoOoO


End file.
